What Does It Mean to Be a Conscious Christian?

Transcribed from the episode audio and lightly edited for readability. Speaker labels are automated and may occasionally be off.

Austin: Because you're not being obedient. The unconscious thing to say about that would be like, "Oh, God just wants me to suffer for 35 years before he heals me." Well, maybe you're being stubborn for 35 years. Maybe you're being unconscious for 35 years.

Rachel: Mm-hmm. Welcome to the Conscious Christian Marriage podcast, where we equip growth-minded Christian couples to excel in their marriage and every area of their life. We are your hosts, Austin and Rachel Holt, and we appreciate you tuning in today.

Austin: Yes, it's exciting to be back. We've had a crazy last couple months, with some travel, with some events, and all kinds of fun stuff that we have going behind the scenes that we'll share more about here soon. But we're thankful to be back in the studio, and we've got a really, really special episode today that is a user-submitted question. So Or follower-submitted question user-submitted question. whatever that means. a follower, submitted a question that we're gonna answer today, and it's actually a question that we've been asked a lot. And I think it's not a controversial question, but it's a question that has come up for a lot of people. And, I think sometimes they're surprised with the answer and how much they might even identify with it.

Rachel: So today's question is, is being conscious new agey? Not New Agey church. Every time I say that

Austin: 'Cause we are AIG.

Rachel: Not New Assemblies of God. What we mean is, like, new age.

Austin: New age.

Rachel: A little bit, not of Christ. Probably out, swinging on the pendulum on something else. So this is a question that a lot of our couples get, when they're telling people about The Conscious Christian Marriage. Because people hear the word conscious, and they don't quite understand. So we are going to share what it means to be conscious today. Not only that, we're gonna share with you the difference between the typical Christian and what a conscious Christian looks like and the life that they live. And then, who knows? Maybe you will identify as a conscious Christian. Maybe you are more of a conscious Christian than you might even know.

Austin: Ooh. Love it.

Rachel: Yeah. All right. Without further ado, we'll go into our appreciations. Austin, I wanna appreciate you for, how gracious you are for me, that you really do forgive and love both the kids and myself seven times 77 times. As the leader of our home and the spiritual leader of our life, I just, I've been blessed by that, and you model that really well for me and for the kids. So thank you.

Austin: I receive that. Thank you. Rach, one thing I wanna appreciate you for is just how flexible you are, and, not in that way, people. But, well, that way. But, you know, mostly in your flexibility with, like, yesterday as we're working on one of our little migrations for our technology and, CCM. We spent, like, six hours yesterday with spreadsheets and very detailed things, syncing up some content and stuff like that. And, I really appreciate that you were willing to find a babysitter and set aside some extra time to dive into that because it's a lot of work, and it's not your favorite thing to do, but it has to be done. And I just appreciate you for being flexible and being willing to modulate so we can do stuff like that.

Rachel: Oh, thank you. I receive that. Well, Austin, I'd love for you to explain to our listeners what is being conscious, or define consciousness before we even dive into what's the difference between a typical Christian and a conscious Christian. So if we're defining consciousness before we step in, what does that mean?

Austin: Yeah, so, conscious is a concept that's been around for a long, long, long time, you know? And so even to think about conscious as being new agey Man, I, I can't say it now. I'm thinking agey. New agey.

Rachel: I let you into the world of my mind.

Austin: I know, you Yeah, you did. you know, it's hard to even think about it as a concept of new age, because, you know, the c the conversation of consciousness has been around forever. And the conver the conversation of being a conscious individual has been around for a long time as well. But to be conscious really means that you're aware. You're curious. You're mindful. You're present. really to be conscious means that, you're not on autopilot. You know, a lot of people talk about, you know, the ego and personas and essence and the psych the psyche and stuff like that, and most people get it wrong. Most people just don't understand that a lot of the psyche, or really a lot of the ego's power is just in autopilot, right? So a lot of times when we're in ego, okay, when our ego is kinda deciding what persona we're gonna use based on what conversation we're in or what person we're with, it's, the ego kinda runs rampant when we're on autopilot.

And really, being conscious is removing that autopilot tendency and becoming conscious about what's happening inside me when I'm experiencing the outside world. So really all it means to be conscious is that as I go about my day, and I'm especially relating to other people, you know relationship is the art of relating to someone. So when I'm relating to you, I'm relating with our kids, I'm relating with clients, with other people, with friends at church, I mean, neighbors, you name it, what I'm really do is, doing is, being, by being conscious, is I'm, I'm reflecting on myself as I'm interacting with other people. I'm reflecting on myself as I experience life. You know, if I trip on the sidewalk, being conscious about that would be like, "Okay, ow, that really hurt. I feel really angry. Huh, why do I feel so angry that I tripped on the sidewalk and I hurt myself? Is it because I'm actually in physical pain, or do I feel silly for having tripped on the sidewalk?"

"And because I made a mistake, do I now think less of myself because I wasn't paying attention and I tripped on the sidewalk?" So being conscious is really understanding what's going on beneath the surface of my interactions with myself and my interactions with other people.

Rachel: Yeah. That's really good. I appreciate you sharing that. And I like the analogy of autopilot because a lot of what we do, our brain's job is to keep us alive. It's not necessarily meant to keep us or to help us to thrive because our jobs, our brain's job is to help us survive, to help keep us away from scary situations. Ouch, pain makes us pay attention, so I'm not gonna do that again. But that means maybe you did experience some really painful experiences as a kid, so now your brain is like, "Let's keep you safe." So you're avoiding maybe connection with people or, certain relationships or depth of love because you're afraid of that rejection. Of course, we could give lots of examples, but it's taking your brain and bringing those unconscious things to the surface to say, "Ah, this is what's running the show-" "and I had no idea." And it's This is why a lot of people, and we're gonna talk more about this, are getting the results that they don't want.

They're seeing this behavior, this action, this reaction, and they're frustrated with it, and they're band-aiding that symptom instead of going to the root. So consciousness would be going to the root. Being aware would be let's bring what's unconscious and calling the shots to our awareness. So then we can heal it with very intentional, which we would say conscious tools which is what is in our toolkit to help heal and grow through that. So it can be super easy. All of us have done it, right? You're driving, and you think Maybe when you move houses or you switch jobs or something, you just drive to the old place - because your brain's like, "I'm not thinking. We're just going. We're in autopilot." We do the same thing in relationships. We just go along the path that's easiest because that's what we've always done.

Austin: Yeah, and you know, the other interesting thing is that a lot of people think You know, when they hear the word conscious in a Christian context, they think of the Christ consciousness. Now, the Christ consciousness is this idea that, a lot of people believe that you can tap into this collective, conscious, mind of Christ, and, I don't necessarily believe in that the way that maybe the more new age crowd teaches the Christ consciousness. But I do believe that we as Christians who, who commune with the Holy Spirit Like, I believe if I'm, I'm praying that the Holy Spirit is in me, and, and I'm in the Spirit and I'm praying through the Spirit, like when we're together praying together or we're praying for, for others, I do, I do believe that part of that mind of Christ is transcending into us through the Holy Spirit. So I don't believe in what the ma the mainline new age movement would say is, you know, the Christ consciousness.

But I do really believe that the consciousness of Christ is found. Like, we are gonna engage with the, the mind of Christ the more in the Holy Spirit that we are. You know, and so I think when some people think conscious Christian, they're like, "Oh, is this like a, you know, a Christ consciousness thing?" Like, "Are you guys trying to say that you can tap into this collective mind of Christ?" And I'm like, well, no, it's not really that. It but at the same time, if we do believe that Jesus left so that we could have the gift of the Holy Spirit, and that the, the gift of the Holy Spirit would reveal so many things to us and teach us and guide us and convict us and steer us towards better things and nudge us towards better things and outcomes and words and actions and thoughts and ways, well, I could see where some people could kinda see overlap there. You know, but

Rachel: And we are being sanctified, right? Like, the goal is that we become more like Christ for sure. And one day live in fullness, dwell in fullness with him. But we're not saying Like, being called the conscious Christian doesn't mean we're saying, "Oh, you can be like Christ," meaning you are- Christ, like you are a god

Austin: Right. And

Rachel: Or you are like God.

Austin: And the, I think the last thing that, you know, I'll say about this piece is when we rebranded, our, our company into The Conscious Christian Marriage, because for the first, what, four or five years we were called Because Marriage Matters

Rachel: Throwback

Austin: And then we rebranded. It's a total God thing when we, when we rebranded, is we wanna help people understand, like, we have been trained and have li have, have experienced some of the best teachers and, and practitioners and methods in the world on what many in the psychology world would call conscious living, and then we have like, the values of our Christian faith. And so the values and the truths and kinda the backbone of our faith. And so really, the conscious Christian is how we take all the very best principles from understanding psychology and counseling and therapy and all these different modalities of change, and which we all believe were inspired by God to begin with. Right? Like, we believe that God, gave these brilliant minds these gifts to understand how we work, 'cause that's how God designed us, and then we've taken that world, and we've put it together with the world of Christianity to help Christians who, you know, we believe that they have the most important part, which is Christ.

And so now it's allowing them, who have the most important part, which is Christ, to express that and let that change them because, like for example, a lot of times a pastor will preach from a stage, "Ignore your emotions. Don't think about your emotions." You know, a lot of it is spiritual override you know, which is, "Hey, like, I, we know you feel sad, we know you feel anger, but just put it at the foot of the cross, and you'll be fine." And I'm not saying that's not ever the right thing to say, but the problem is when that type of thing is taught, someone then thinks, "Okay, I need to ignore my emotions, okay? I need to give them to God," but that kinda means, like, just forget them and ignore them. Well, a lot of times the emotion is the block to them understanding Christ and engaging with Christ and being in communion with Christ. Because maybe they're so angry, they can't soften up their heart enough to approach Christ.

Now, can, does Christ have the ability to come in and soften someone's heart in an instant? Absolutely. We've seen that happen a million times, okay? Especially in, you know, worship and prayer nights and that kind of thing. and just in conversations where I've seen the, the Spirit of God just soften the hardest hearts of stone to make them a heart of flesh. More often what I see is when someone is willing to, like, dive deep into those emotions, they'll actually find Christ there. Like, when they're willing to actually be with their sadness and be with their anger and they realize, "Oh, I'm angry because I'm sad. I'm sad because I was wounded, and, and in my woundedness I realize how badly I need a savior." The Conscious Christian not only brings together those two worlds, but it's really empowering Christians, to understand that, like, God is teaching them through, God can be teaching them through every aspect of their experience.

Rachel: Yeah, exactly. So let's talk about the difference between what we would say is probably the typical Christian and the conscious Christian so we can give our listeners a distinctive difference to know, like, oh, this is what living the conscious Christian life looks like. This is, this is how we model it. So for starters, the typical Christian, like you just mentioned, spiritually overrides. And this could also be, be referred to as,

Austin: Just

Rachel: Bypassing spiritual bypassing. And what that looks like is, you know, saying, "Oh, just pray," you know, "Take it to God," you know, "Have joy," right? Like the joy of the Lord and, and it's using scripture, which again, we highly believe in scripture, run our life by scripture, quote scripture pray scripture over ourselves and our kids every day. But the difference is they are just turning to that and not turning inward. They're saying, "Oh, I'm just gonna pray," but what God wants us to do is to commune with him to co-labor with him to actually get the results. And the difference is the conscious Christian, they have tools. They're intentional. They get curious. They have this awareness to if they see something or something is taking them out of flow, right? Like life is great, right? Something happens. The c typical Christian will say, "Oh, this is just the Lord's will." Or, "Oh, it's the devil." The conscious Christian will say, "Hmm, why am I feeling angry right now?"

"What is coming up for me?"

Austin: Yeah, what's the Holy Spirit trying to teach me through my experience right now?

Rachel: Yes. What does this remind me of? What part of myself have I not healed, have I not loved, have I not forgiven? And of course, through that and our conscious tools, they actually find the healing and the results versus the spiritual bypassing that's just saying, "Oh, oh, just give it to God. Just give it to God." "Lay it at the foot of the cross."

Austin: Yeah, and then what, what accidentally happens there is a lot of times Christians pray that God would just solve the, the, outcome not the problem. Because, like if you're experiencing, you know, anxiety, that's the outcome of unfelt emotions and unprocessed trauma and l a lack of forgiveness or a buildup of resentment. So a lot of times it's like, you know, a Christian might pray, like, "God, just solve my anxiety." Well, if God just solves your anxiety, you're gonna have anxiety again. Okay? What a conscious Christian does is says, "Hey, God, there's something in me that's producing this result and I want you to help me figure out what has to change or heal in me so that this outcome over here is no longer produced."

Rachel: Because here's the thing. If God were to just heal you, first of all, we have free will, right? So we get to co-labor with God. It's pa it's partly on us.

Austin: It's part, yeah, mm-hmm.

Rachel: But if he was to come in and divinely heal, which he does which is amazing, but it does require us asking. But let's say you're just saying, "Lord, heal my anxiety," and so he comes in and he heals your anxiety. It would happen again because you didn't learn the lesson. You didn't heal the actual, the wound. So you would create the same, you'd create the same results, the same scenario, and you'd get the same results again. So there's that. God doesn't wanna just snap his fingers and heal us because there's a lesson.

Austin: Yeah, he wants to equip us.

Rachel: Yes, and then that's what I was gonna say. Number two is he also wants to equip us because why are we here on this earth? We're here to make disciples of all nations. And so if we, if he heals us and we didn't know how or why or the steps or the process, we didn't learn, like cognitively learn and, and co-labor with God in the results, then we're not going to be equipped to know how to spread that to others to teach others. Like everything that we're doing here, it's because we have learned it for us. So now we're equipped. Like I am healing. Like the Lord has me continually healing and on this journey, so then I am continually getting equipped for how I can show up for others, how I can help them along the journey. So, like if you have a mentor, they've been through things and the Lord has co-labored with them to give them those results so that they can be a mentor to you.

And so if, if we were just, you know, if God was just snapping his fingers and healing us all the time, and we were just saying, "Lord, I'm just gonna pray, and it's in your hands and heal us," and he did, then we would be, we'd kinda be like bottle-fed babies where we wouldn't have the actual tangible felt and understood and the depth of the growth so that we could then pass it on to others. So that's super powerful. That's what a conscious Christian, one of the aspects of a conscious Christian behind the scenes what it looks like, in their brain what it looks like, how they're processing difficult situations. So another aspect of a typical Christian would be that they are dependent on church. That they are experiencing spiritual highs week to week. And the highest spiritual highs are coming from church, like big C church where they're going to a building on Sunday mornings. Those are the biggest spiritual highs they're experiencing, and it's their greatest and sometimes super, super sadly their only input for growth and learning.

The conscious Christian, on the other hand, is intentional, seeking. You know, this is, this might be you, the listener, because you're here on this podcast. It's you're showing up in the trenches day in, day out. You're seeking wisdom. You're being super intentional about it. You know that your faith is not in the hands of your pastor. You, your church is a part of partnering for ministry, and it blesses you, but you're a partner with it, and you are showing up out of the overflow of your own spiritual walk and pouring into the community there if that makes sense.

Austin: So it is important to understand that one of the biggest differences is that a typical Christian and someone who we'd consider more of a conscious Christian, they have those daily spiritual disciplines that maybe you know, what their pastor's preaching on a Sunday might be amazing, and it's inspiring and encouraging, and it's rooted in the Word, and then they take that and they go, "How can I apply that and live in that all week long?" To where the only place that I'm getting spiritual fed is not just on Sundays but that we as a family are also pastoring inside our home. Like, you know, for our kids, like, their main pastor is me.

Rachel: Yeah, that's one thing I was gonna appreciate you for, is that you have led our family really well in that way to set aside time every single morning, no matter what we're doing- 7:00 AM, at the table with our Bibles, candles lit, worship music going, and that is really beautiful. By the way, thank you for creating the life that we have so that we can do that, that we have the freedom and the ability to do that. Which, listener, you have the freedom and ability to create whatever you want. Just a little plug side there. So thank you, Austin, for creating that because, yes, we are not relying on someone outside of our family to spiritually lead our children and, and our marriage. So yeah, thank you for that. So another trait of a typical Christian is that they are super frustrated behind the scenes, but they are repeating, unconscious patterns over and over. They're It's kinda like insanity, right? They're getting the same results, maybe trying things the same way.

But they're repeating sin patterns or really it's, it's sin ultimately if we shake it down. It's like maybe you have an anger problem, maybe you have a porn problem, maybe you're just impatient, maybe you're disrespectful to your husband, maybe you have road rage, you know? maybe you do not show, self-control in the way that you eat. Like, there are unconscious things calling the shots, and you're frustrated about it, and you've tried maybe the spiritual path, maybe, maybe, blaming it on spiritual warfare or this must be God's plans for my suffering. This is the thing. The typical Christian, they think when something bad happens or they're, they're not conquering their sin, it's like, man, this is spiritual warfare. I can't tell you how many times, we've had couples that come into our stratosphere. They used to live this way where they s they'd say, "Oh, man, we're just, we're just under attack right now." Or they're like, "Oh, God's just, you know, this is, like, His will for our suffering."

And then when the light bulb goes off and they get unplugged from the Matrix and they realize, oh, my word, there's a different way to do things, they know, that when something difficult happens, they get curious, they look inward, they ask questions, they, they heal it. They have the conscious tools to say, oh, my word. Wow, God. God is actually revealing this to me. Those difficult situations that I used to blame on the devil are actually my greatest opportunity for healing and for growth, and that's where the fruit, the fruit of the- Spirit comes alive in my life because I'm actually I'm not looking at it from a victim place. I'm taking responsibility, and I'm owning it in power that, man, this is actually God's area for me to grow, and I'm gonna own it, and I'm gonna grow in this way.

Austin: Yeah, and that's where Man, we could get so deep with this, but that's where so many dangerous things happen for Christians. So for example, like, let's just say that, let's just say that you do have a pornography problem, and, you know, you're like, "Oh, the devil's just attacking me." And so if you look at it that way, you lose the most important part. The most important part is you have a pornography problem because you more than likely have ano another problem that's expressing as pornography. For men, and, and also for women, but mostly for men, for example, like, that's personal significance. Most men that have a pornography problem have a significance problem. They have an identity problem. and for women, it's usually a connection problem. And so if you, if you believe that because you wanna look at porn is because of the devil, and it's not because you are a human, person who has sexual desires and sexual drive, and you also have drives for things like significance and connection and power and all of that, when you don't know kind of the inner workings of why those things or deficiency in those things would lead to that habit, you might always be a slave to the habit because you're blaming it on Satan.

Yeah, like, I've worked with a ton of men to help them get unaddicted from pornography, and almost all of them think that it's a, it's, it's more of a sexual issue or my sex life isn't good enough, whatever. It's almost never that. It's usually a, I don't feel like a significant man. I don't have sufficient leadership and authority in my own family. I'm not respected in my own family because I haven't shown up well, but, I can go experience these things in pornography that make me feel like I'm desirable and I'm all these things or that I have power or that I have control. And so if, if when we are struggling in these problems, we're unconscious about it, and that's like oh, I'm, I must be under spiritual warfare right now. So then it's like, okay, you know, devil be gone in Jesus' name. Don't ever, you know, touch me, attack me again, whatever.

Rachel: Just delete Instagram.

Austin: Yeah, I'll just delete my Instagram. And, and I'm not saying that Like, I mean, we should be speaking over the spiritual, you know, powers. Like, I agree with that. And at the same time, we can look inward and go, huh, I wonder why I turn to this habit. I wonder what is missing in me. What truth about me am I not remembering, relying on, or believing that's causing me to do this? And so the conscious Christian does not unconsciously, abdicate themselves of their responsibility. They'll get curious. They'll look inward. They'll ask the right questions. They'll seek the right counsel to help them figure out, like, what is unconscious that needs to come to light? And when I become conscious about it, like oh, okay, maybe I look at pornography because I don't think I'm significant. I don't think I'm powerful. I don't think people find me desirable. I don't think my spouse finds me desirable. Or, and, and once you realize that thing, you're like, oh, like, do I really believe those things?

And then, you know, we can audit that, and we can either, you know, we can either shift the belief, or we can, you know, kinda rewire something in the brain that needs, or the heart that needs to be healed which then shifts the belief, you know, through the different methods that we use. And, and all of it is inviting God into every part of it.

Rachel: That's exactly what I was gonna say because the healing, you know, Jehovah Rapha, He is our healer, and He is in everything that we do, but it does require us being intentional and us saying, "God, I wanna have eyes to see and ears to hear." And if we don't- Like, if we are not ready for it and we don't want to receive the feedback from God of like, "Here's the actual thing"- like Him pressing on it and revealing it and bringing it to the surface, He's not going to because we're not willing. And so being a conscious Christian looks like being willing, getting curious, asking those questions, and the Holy Spirit is in it, and He guides and reveals and leads us. And then when we're doing these psychology-based practices that are rooted in the way that God designed our heart, soul, mind, strength to work- God is in it because He is our healer. And it's absolutely amazing and absolutely powerful.

Austin: Yeah. And I, and I think even you hit on this before, too, you know, h it's amazing how many people have come into our world that have said, "Yeah, this is just God's plan, that I'm supposed to suffer." And we're like, "Okay, what I'm hearing you say there is maybe you're lacking faith right now, or maybe you're-" "lacking an understanding of how much God loves you and how big His plan is for you-" and you've resigned to this idea that you're supposed to just suffer forever," you know? Or you believe that for some reason God wants you to suffer. Have you asked yourself the question, "Maybe I'm doing something to prolong my suffering"? "Maybe I'm out of obedience right now-" and God is waiting until I'm obedient for Him to start blessing me again." And this is, this is What I'm about to say could be controversial, and it could be kind of a It c it could rub some people the wrong way, but h here's what you have to understand.

I believe God loves all of us the same, but His favor moves through patterns of our obedience. Okay? So I really believe that God loves everybody the same. When I look at people's lives where I'm like, "Wow, God is really favoring them-" like blessing them, like, wow, like, it's like He's opening all the doors and all the gates

Rachel: They're anointed

Austin: And the paths are st oh, they're anointed. Generally what I find out is in the nook and crannies of their private life they're highly obedient.

Rachel: S yeah.

Austin: They're incredibly obedient, okay? and I really believe that for some of us, like if we say, "God, make us better, discipline us, lead us, make us all these things," well, how does a really good father, a really good coach, a really good leader make someone better? They become disciplined. You know? So a lot of times people wanna pray, "God, make me better," but they don't wanna go in the forge. You know, like, "God, make me better," but they don't wanna be sharpened with iron. Like, "God, make me better," but they don't want discipline, you know? Like, they want all the fruit and all the reward without the discipline, right? Well, the discipline is, it's just corrective action is what it is. And so if we're being disobedient, if we're like, "God, make me better. Sharpen me. Purify me," all of that, like all the scriptures we say and all the songs we sing, well, then so if God does prolong something from you because you're not being obedient the unconscious thing to say about that would be like, "Oh, God just wants me to suffer for 35 years before He heals me."

Well, maybe you're being stubborn for 35 years. Maybe you're being unconscious for 35 years. Maybe if you would take a second, slow down, and go, "Hmm, what is my role in everything that I'm asking God for, to rescue me, to make me better," and all that. You know, like Saint Augustine said, "Praise if it depends on God. Work like it depends on us." If God was a creator and He made us in our image, or, or made us in His image as an image-bearer we get to create with God. Like, are you forgetting to labor with Him? Like, we get to co-labor with Christ, like you said.

Rachel: Yeah. And this might be for somebody. I know we've talked a lot about emotional healing and, you know, like healing through, the results that we're getting. Well, the example of a physical healing that you might be praying for, I've seen this a lot where someone might be praying for physical healing from God, and God is not answering because they actually are addicted to being a victim because God heals them, and then there's something else. And they're, they enjoy the attention from people, and they enjoy people feeling sorry for them. And so they're asking for God to heal them, but really, they are enjoying being a victim. And this

Austin: Yeah, it's 'cause their identity is wrapped up in a victim persona.

Rachel: Yes. And there's something there that's unconsciously calling the shots that's saying, "I actually never got this." "I, I really want this."

Austin: Yeah. The something that's there is that when they were younger, the only generally the main times they got attention, love, or anything was when they were a victim.

Rachel: So then it's this unconscious pattern that we need to bring to light. And as it's brought to light and as it's healed, then God says, "Ah, you get it now." "So now I'm gonna heal you."

Austin: Yeah. And it's unfortunate because a lot of us, were victimized as kids. And then we didn't have the skills, we didn't have the tools, we didn't have the mentors to help us understand these patterns, and then they get internalized as adults. So then we have a lot of adults running around that are chronically ill all year long because deep down, they know they only get attention when they're ill. Or if they always have to be up in arms about something. Comment in the comments below what show I'm quoting. I'm not

Rachel: I'm always up in arms about something

Austin: Always up in arms about something. That was really good. That was not even rehearsed. But if someone can name that TV show, comment it below.

Rachel: Okay, that laugh was hilarious.

Austin: And so, you know, or if someone's always up in arms about something, well, when they are in a state of panic is when people are like, "Whoa, are you okay? Are you okay? Are you okay?" And that's what everybody wants. Like they want sympathy and, and compassion and love from people. And so a lot of, there's a lot of Christians who have the Jesus part, at least they have a known sense in their mind, or maybe they've been saved and they have not allowed Christ to get t through to every part of who they are. And so then from the outside looking in, a lot of people wouldn't even know that they're a Christian because they're still dealing with all these anger problems. They're still projecting. they still have all these internalized patterns, and every time that one of these patterns rears its head, their pastor just says, "Oh, well, just pray about it and just lay it at the foot of the cross." So then they do that, okay?

So they come to the foot of the cross. They lay down their problems. They lay down their patterns. And then if God doesn't immediately do something about it, their, their whole identity comes down. It, their faith comes down. Because we shouldn't be telling people that all you have to do is lay it down at the foot of the cross. It should be bring that to God. Ask God what He wants you to do. Ask God how He wants you to partner with Him, okay? And, and then find other people in the body- Okay?

Rachel: To discern his voice

Austin: Think about, think about, yeah, think about how much we're, instructed in the Word to be utilizing the body. Okay? And so when we tell people things like this, it can actually deconstruct their faith. Because then they think, "Oh, if God doesn't answer my prayer right now, it means that I'm not worthy- God's not real, or maybe God doesn't love me."

Rachel: That leads us to our next point. The typical Christian is f feeling shame behind the scenes because they're asking these exact questions. They're s they're saying, "Gosh darn it, I have these r repeating patterns. Man, God hasn't healed me of this. He must not love me, or something's wrong with me, or maybe I'm demon-possessed, or, like, I'm under spiritual warfare, or gosh, something is wrong with me, like who I am." Or, I, you know, I know God says he loves me, but I don't have a felt sense of that and I sure don't believe it, you know? And their shame is identity-based, and so a lot of typical Christians are operating from a place of shame. Like, you know, you talk about sexual sin or, or a porn addiction. Like, they they're looking at the label of that they're identifying as that, and then they're just attacking the symptoms, and they're getting, like, nowhere. You know? They might be okay for a couple weeks or a month, and then the r the patterns reoccur and the sin reemerges.

And this could be any sin, but it's the shame that really, drives an unconscious Christian or a typical Christian. But the, the conscious Christian understands. Like, they l allow guilt. Like, "Okay, I did that wrong thing. That was wrong. I would like that to motivate me." They use that as the guilt to motivate them to, "I don't wanna live out of integrity." "I wanna honor Christ in everything that I do." And so they're operating from a place of, "This is my identity." They're super aware of their identity. Not like, "I'm a daughter of Christ," which is great, of course, but they know, "This, these are the details of my identity, that I am worthy, that this is who I am, this is my plan, this is my purpose." They have it written on their wall. You know? Like, they're living by it every single day because they're extremely intentional about it, and from that place, they're showing up with integrity. And because they're getting those results of the fruit of the Spirit, because they're not coming from a place of shame, they're coming from a place of identity, and allowing guilt to motivate them, not bring them down into a shame cycle of like, "Oh, this is who I am."

They're super conscious Christians are super intentionable, intentional about their words.

Austin: Yeah. And I, I think one of the most important things to understand is that for a lot of people, when they feel anxiety, or they even use the phrase misalignment. Misalignment means that we are acting in ways that don't align with our values. Okay? So for the, for the average Christian, you know, they might do things that don't align with their values. They get frustrated, they get, they feel resistance, they hit walls, they hit roadblocks, and then they get upset about it. And then they go to God and they're like, "God, why is this happening? Why do I feel anxious about this? Why am I getting this negative result?" And what they're doing is they're overriding their guilt, 'cause remember, guilt is about behavior, shame is about identity. And so they say that, that they're this person, but then their actions don't match that. So then they feel a misalignment, and they start to feel guilty about it. Well, w and when they feel guilty, instead of turning towards the guilt and studying it, they want to victimize themselves, and then they wanna go to God with it and say, "God, what the heck is going on?"

And so if we live in our guilt too long, it turns into shame. Right? So then for the average Christian, they live in that guilt for a long time. That g that, that guilt reshapes their identity. They think they're a bad person, so then they go to God. And then what's happening is their brain keeps them stuck, because if we think that we're bad people then our behavior will match that. Because the brain loves continuity. So the brain will give you what you believe you are. Your brain will d generally lead you into situations and places and relationships based on what you think you deserve or what you believe is gonna happen next. You actually have this thing in your brain called your reticular activation system that, essentially what you, what you are looking for, you will find. Okay? And so, but what a conscious Christian does is they say, "Okay, I feel guilty about blank behavior, and that must mean that that behavior is out of my integrity."

So rather than me staying in that or victimizing myself to that and then, you know, believing like, "Oh, I must be a bad guy," a conscious Christian takes their guilt, they use that as an indicator that they're out of integrity. They find where they're out of integrity, and then they get busy on getting back in integrity. And that's a combination of things. It's a combination of, doing the work ourselves and going to God and partnering with God on the work as well. Because the conscious Christian, a big difference between a typical Christian and a conscious Christian is that the conscious Christian understands they have a heart, a soul, a mind, and a strength. And all four of those dimensions of who they are must be nurtured and they must be submitted to God.

Rachel: Yeah. Another point that I was gonna say is that the typical Christian super sadly is hypocritical because they have a really hard time lining up their heart, soul, mind, strength and, and being a example of the fruit of the spirit. Like, have you ever been hurt by a Christian? Have you ever been backstabbed by a Christian? Have you ever been, you know, gossiped about by a Christian or, you know, cut off - on the highway by a Christian? Or, you name it, right? Like, have you ever been judged by a Christian, right? Like, everybody probably raises their hands. And the difference between, the typical Christian in that way and a conscious Christian is that when sin pops up, instead of attacking the symptom, the conscious Christian is gonna get to the root. And so because of that, there's gonna be more fruit. I like that that rhymed, and I like that it both had, like, a plant analogy. but it's true. They'll get to the root of it, but- And because of that, they're going to have the fruit, the fruits of the Spirit they're embodying those because they are super aware.

They're hyper-aware. They're always getting curious, and it's going to show. And so if you, you know, as our listener, have been frustrated at any point where you're like, "Man, why am I not living out the fruits of the spirit? Like, why am I getting this result that, you know, X, Y, or Z that is not being an example of God either, you know, to those in my community or to my children or to my spouse or, you know, the people I'm leading? Like, I'm disappointing myself." If that's what the results you're getting, then there's a better way. We wanna encourage you that there's a better way. And that's that's where you can get really good results.

Austin: Yeah, and the other angle of the fruits of the spirit that most people will not ever understand is that when you're a typical Christian, the way that you would audit how you're doing as a believer or the way that you would audit maybe your status quo is might be like, "Well, I don't wanna experience this. I don't wanna experience that. I don't wanna be anxious." "I don't wanna be angry. I don't wanna be this. I don't wanna be broke. I don't wanna be unhealthy. I don't wanna be all these things," right? Well, that's like So the typical Christian kind of audits themselves by, like, that deduction. A conscious Christian audits themselves by what fruits of the spirit do I wanna create more of. Like, a conscious Christian would look at the fruits of the spirit, all those things that p- Paul talks about in Galatians, Galatians 5:20, I think, and goes, "If I'm missing any of those fruits, then I must, uh That must mean to me that I want to s seek the Spirit more, and I want to get rid of anything, in my heart and my mind or heal something in my heart and my mind so that I can produce more of those fruit."

Like, they audit themselves by, "Am I producing the fruits of the spirit?" It's not by, like, "Oh, I need to get rid of these things." It's, it's, "I will know that I'm being led by the Spirit by the fruits that I bear."

Rachel: Yeah. The, the conversations that I have with, people maybe wanting to come into our community, I'll ask them, like, "What do you want to experience?" "What do you want to experience, or what do you want to experience more of?" And there's a variety of of responses, and a lot of times, the typical Christian says, "Well, I don't want this, and I don't want that," and that tells me there's some work to there's some growth to shifting into When I even asked and presented with the question, "What do you want?" They say They tell me what they don't want.

Austin: They don't want. Yeah.

Rachel: And so the conscious Christian is saying, "I want to walk in integrity." "I want this," because like you said, with our reticular activation system, we will see what we are speaking. We speak into being. And so just like God did, which is actually amazing we're created in His image, and we can speak life over our life. And so that's why the little nuanced words that we say, we don't even say, "I should do that." That's a word that we don't say. You know, we say, "I want to do that." Or, "I could do that. I'm thinking about doing that. Yeah, I wanna do that." Because everything that we say has great intention because words are life or death. And so, yeah, I love that point.

Austin: Even when you speak to your plants, they grow better.

Rachel: So true, and your goats.

Austin: It is true. Yeah. And your goats.

Rachel: I have, shout-out to my goats. You can save a goat, and you can really, truly, honestly Not that many of our listeners probably are goat people, but if you have a sour goat, you can tell them you're, you don't regret buying them. And within a week

Austin: That's great.

Rachel: Sorry, that was a loud laugh. Within a week, they will turn around, and they'll be your favorite goat ever.

Austin: And, and if they don't, you can ship them to our farm and, we'll whip them into shape.

Rachel: Love them, love them into shape.

Austin: Yeah, yeah. Love them into sh- Oh, yeah, yeah. Whoops. Oh, yeah. I'll have to edit that out. Yeah, we'll love them into shape. Got it. Perfect. I think that one of the last things that we ought to just talk about really lightly here is that there is I think the stigma's changing. I think it's finally getting better, but there's also, in a lot of the mainline church, it's kind of this boo conscious, boo psychology, boo counseling, boo therapy because I think the church feels threatened by it because, like, you know, it's interesting to me, how often someone will get up on stage at a church that doesn't know anything about psychology but will talk about psychology who's actually never watched the, interdiscipline of psychology change someone's life. And, and they think that anything that doesn't have the label Jesus behind it is gonna threaten people in their congregation. But what a lot of pastors forget is that God gave the gift of psychology to really brilliant, submissive people who wanted to help other people and understand how God made them.

I mean, you and I have been in, you know, this world for over seven and a half, almost eight years, together, doing marriage work, and the amount of modalities of counseling and coaching and therapy and healing and all these things that we've learned, we've realized, it's like God left all these, secret keys and doorways and opportunities and openings in the brain and the heart to help people change. And some of it, like, even in, in, what we call the divine setup, you know, which is the idea that God brought you somebody, that the very thing that they, that you want from them to help you heal is, like, gonna be the hardest thing for them to give you and vice versa. And that's why sometimes, like, what, those matches are so difficult in marriage, but that's God's design for healing. When we study psychology and interpersonal neurobiology and all, all these different fields, we actually see God's fingerprint through all of it. And so if the church could understand, and if the typical- Christian could understand that, all of this quote-unquote science behind the mind and the psyche and our neurology and our limbic systems and our, our endocrine systems and all, all these things

Rachel: All God designed

Austin: It's all God designed. And it's all pointing back to Him. And so once they realize that, you know, your faith in God and your utilization in these tools does not have to be mutually exclusive that's when Christians go from typical Christian to conscious Christian, when they're like- "Okay, I can rely on God, rely on the Holy Spirit, rely on the Word, rely on Christ, and I can work with people who are wildly talented at helping people, understand their own, psyche, understand their own beliefs, understand their own patternings, connect all the dots in those things. And then in that place, I can take it to God, and God can heal me on a completely different level. And so

Rachel: And, well, and then what happens is it's addicting in a really, really good way because they get results, and they're like, "What?" "Where has this been my whole life?" "This is awesome."

Austin: Yeah, because

Rachel: "This is amazing."

Austin: Because then you

Rachel: "Oh my word"

Austin: You become unoffendable. You stop rejecting onto other people. You have better relationships. You, you end up becoming more successful in your work, more successful in your health because most physical disease is a manifestation of mental emotional disease. And so, yeah, people have this epiphany when they come and work with us, like if they join our membership program. And then they're, of course, surrounded by tons of amazing couples all over the country that are also on this same path into becoming conscious Christians. And they're like, "Where has this been? Where have these people been that love Christ with all their heart and also understand how their heart, their soul, their mind, and their strength works?" It goes back to the core scripture behind, you know, CCM, to love the Lord your God with your heart, soul, mind, and strength. the Jews prayed it every day as the Shema. Jesus quoted it and reminded them and actually added, the, the, the mind to it when He spoke it in the New Testament, that it was so important that He quoted the Shema and said it again.

"Love the Lord your God with all four of these dimensions of who you are." Because when we do that, when those four parts of who we are are healed, present, nurtured, understood they can be leveraged for the Kingdom of God. They can be leveraged to bless your marriage. They can be leveraged to bless your children. And everybody who meets you, their, their lives are gonna be different, okay? The most unselfish thing you can do is to work on yourself. The most unselfish thing you can do is to sharpen and understand your mind, your heart, your soul, your trauma, your baggage, your wounding, your all that stuff, and you convert all of that into a story of grace. And you convert all that into evidence of God's goodness and all that into this, this masterpiece of a story that's like, "Through my partnership with God, I was able to heal these things so that I don't have to work that out on anybody else." "I can just be present."

Okay? The most present people on the planet, they've worked out their stuff. So then they can actually absorb from other people and listen without projection, listen without filters listen without judgment. This is how people come to Christ when people listen to them without judgment, listen to them without fear. Most people have never worked their own stuff out so they can't listen to other people except through all their filters. So then when they reply back to them, it's through all their filters of their experience. The other person, it doesn't make sense. It doesn't land, and then they're like, "I don't wanna be a Christian," because you're not listening. You don't get it. Like if this is a representation of what God is like, I'm just not involved. So the more conscious we are, the more Christ-driven we are, when those two things come together, that's where the magic happens.

Rachel: Mm-hmm. Yeah. It's so true. And we had, just in December, somebody who joined our coaching program, as a couple, and then she is doing coaching with me. In our first initial call, she said, "I just feel like I'm drowning and I can't, I literally can't do this anymore. I can- I don't wanna go another day." "I don't wanna go another day with these results." And within, like, three months, I kid you not, the people at their business were like, "What are you guys doing?" "Something's different with you." They're like

Austin: Their close friends were saying that.

Rachel: Yeah, their family's like, "Wow, you're really growing. I, like, you " Or they go to a friend, and the friend's like, "If this would've happened, like, three months ago, you would've been bawling, boo-hoo crying on my couch for, like, three hours." And you're just like, "Hey, like, they, they must be going through a tough time." Like hurting people hurt people, and you're just, like, not even offended by this. You're not even upset or fazed. And so these are the re real-time real-people results that are happening every day within our community. And it's so fun, like I said.

Austin: Yeah. Yep. So they

Rachel: It's addicting in the best kind of way .

Austin: That's right. So this is just a glimpse into what it means to be a conscious Christian. And, we'll probably talk more and more about this as time goes on because we wanna help the world understand, you know, on a, on a deeper level. So. That brings us to our nonprofit shout-out. And so today, we are shouting out, ReHope. ReHope is a Kansas City area based organization that empowers and elevates survivors of human trafficking and sexual exploitation through its faith-based, trauma-informed residence and recovery programs. We love this organization. we've, we've actually, been, been involved with different things they've done over the years, and so we're, we're big fans of ReHope. You can learn more about them at rehope.org. And it is our hope and prayer that you would join us in donating to them today, even if it's $5. but we just encourage you to join us, donate to ReHope, and know that that money is going to an amazing team helping amazing people.

Rachel: They also have a shop, I believe.

Austin: Yeah, they do.

Rachel: So you could donate something and get, like, a cool mug out of the deal. All right. Well, we appreciate you all tuning in today. Give us a like, thumbs up, comment, subscribe. And especially if you got something out of this episode, we encourage you to share this with your friends. Start a conversation with them about it, what you think it means to be a conscious Christian, and share this because if it blessed you, we you are the people that get it into other people's hands. So please share, please like, please subscribe. We love and appreciate you and hope to see you on the next episode.